Sometime later, the boys are walking away from their respective locations and meet back up again.
Dean: They put freakin’ make-up on us, the bastards!
Sam: I know what this is—it’s a TV show.
Dean: Ya think?
Sam: No, here. This place—this Twilight Zone that Balty zapped us into is a place where our lives are a TV Show.
Sam: I don’t know.
Dean: No, seriously, why would anybody want to watch our lives?
Dean, sweetie, there’s not enough hours in what remains of this day to list the reasons. *sighs happily*
Sam: According to the interviewer, not very many people do.
(Yeah, but what we lack in number we make up for in passion.)
Sam: We’re somewhere where you’re Jensen Ackles and I’m something called a Jared Padalecki.
Dean: So, what, now you’re Polish?
They head outside soundstage 4 and Dean immediately sees the Impala. His body sags with relief.
Dean: At least my baby made it!
He spies a prop guy dousing the car with dirt and his face twists up in rage. Calling out, “Hey!” he heads toward him, but pulls up short when he sees multiple Impalas, all in various conditions—some beat to Hell. He puts his hands out to his sides and Sam looks at him worriedly.
Dean: I feel sick. I’m gonna be sick.
Sam gapes at the Impala harem silently. They start walking through the set, eyes down, but looking around.
Dean: I wanna go home. I feel like this whole place is bad touching me.
Sam: Yeah. I know. Me, too.
Dean: What do you think?
Dean: Our best shot. If he’s still alive.
They duck off into a side alcove and Dean bows his head, praying, “Dear Castiel, who art hiding in Heaven, we pray that you have your ears on…breaker breaker?”
Just then, through the fake alley, they see Cas standing off alone, trench coat and all. Relieved they hurry over and start bombarding him with questions.
Dean: What did Balty do to us?
Cas pauses, drops his chin and in a very Batman-esque voice rumbles, “To keep you out of Virgil’s reach, he’s cast you into an alternate reality, similar to ours in some respects but dramatically different in others.”
Okay, I admit to Friday-night brain-fade. It took me until mid-way through the episode to realize who the heck ‘Virgil’ was—the angel hit man. In fact, I thought Cas said “the Virgin’s reach” at first and only later realized that it was Virgil when I figured out who the heck ‘Virgil’ was. I think I need to figure out the CC on my TV. *laughs at self*
Dean: So, like…bizzarro Earth.
Cas: Um…yeah, well, no time to explain.
He asks Sam for the key (which was my ah-ha! It was a key! moment) and says it’s to a room where Balty holds all of Heaven’s weapons and with those weapons, Cas can rally his forces. Which, is actually what happens, but it’s totally bizzarro world because here, it’s all scripted and fake—so some things are fake, except that they’re actually real, and others are fake because they are fake.
Got it? Great. *glances to the side*
Anyway! Sam gives Cas the key and asks him what was up with all this TV crap.
Dean: Amen, Padaleski.
Sam: Pretty sure.
Cas—in a very not-Cas voice—begins flipping through a script and says, “Man! Did they put out new pages?”
Sam: Is this some kind of a cosmic joke?
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